It starts with a tickle in the throat...

It's a Saturday and I'm sick again.

I've been sick a lot this year, and it's beginning to trouble me. It's awfully inconvenient to have a sore throat every 2 months when you're trying to be a professional singer. Every time I have to spare my voice I have little internal panic attacks: What if I'm not physically able to sing for a living? Suppose I'm not strong enough? What will I do if my voice never comes back?

It's an exercise in patience to remain quiet long enough to heal. And the longer I have to remain silent, the further my dream seems to recede. A whole year has passed since I made the decision to be a singer, and I haven't got much to show for it. Granted, life's been a bit of a bitch lately. Monte and I are both dealing with illness in our families and I haven't been able to concentrate on much else. But I'm staggered by how quickly the year has passed, and how little I've accomplished in terms of my chosen career. Sitting here in enforced silence, this lack of progress feels especially frustrating.

I want to say something inspiring to wrap up this post, but nothing's coming to mind. I guess this is just God's way of telling me to be still for awhile, although it seems like I should be doing exactly the opposite...

I'm off to bed now. I hope that sleep will revive my pipes enough so that I can sing at church tomorrow morning. There's nothing so disappointing as missing out on a Sunday Celebration at Glide.