Sunday Afternoon Fellowship

I got to hear Douglass Fitch preach again this weekend, but this time I was a little too preoccupied to hear the message. I think it was something along the lines of "Just say yes," which works out perfectly, because I already wrote about that.

I was preoccupied because I was singing in the service and I was nervous. I was nervous because I hadn't been able to attend any rehearsals, being that they were held during the workday. This is a problem that keeps cropping up - more and more I find that these musician-types aren't confined by the typical 9 to 5. When I told Martin I had to work, he seemed surprised - just as surprised as I was when he told me that rehearsal was being held at noon on a Thursday.

So anyway, the 4-piece band and the 3 other singers met twice without me, and I'd been trying to learn the songs on my own. The idea was to have each of us lead a song while the others sang backup, but after my experience last week I was not so comfortable singing lead with no rehearsal. So I opted to sing backup vocals only. Basically, I wimped out.

I dedicated myself to learning the harmonies throughout the week. I put the songs on my iPod and listened to them repeatedly: while running, while on the BART, while at work. I almost felt secure in my parts by the time the service rolled around, but I should have figured there would be some changes to the program.

First of all, one of the microphones didn't work - and we only had two to start with - so the background singers were left without a mic. Then Gisele looked over my lyrics and began to point out phrases and say things like, "Oh, we're not going to do that part. Our version is different."

"It's not like the recording?" I asked, alarmed.

"Well, it basically is...Except we don't do that part either. And we do a little thing in the middle...You'll figure it out," she assured me, reading the nerves on my face. "It's easy." Then she left to distribute programs and I turned to Emma Jean to deconstruct another tune.

"Your song is straight off the track, right? There aren't any changes?"

"Right," she confirmed. "Except we do it in another key. It's here - hmmm. No wait - hmmm. Huh. Is that it?"

Gisele was called over to help us determine the key and I was seriously dismayed when she began singing the harmony - a completely different harmony than the one I'd learned. The congregation was gathering, we were due to start any minute, and it was dawning on me that I was going to have to fake the whole thing. Suddenly I was glad that my microphone didn't work.

My fears proved unnecessary, since the Sunday Afternoon Fellowship is a pretty laid back affair. Still, I do not enjoy winging it during a performance. I come from an extremely rigid choral singing background, where 'winging it' is akin to 'horrible disaster'. It instilled in me a fierce desire to rehearse the hell out of every piece. But also, I want to be as prepared as I can, because I never want people to think that I don't take this seriously. I always want to give a good show, no matter if I'm headlining a world tour or singing for a couple of friends in my living room.

I think someday this dedication to preparation will serve me well, but right now it just sort of makes me afraid to take risks. For instance, I shrank from the microphone when Gisele asked me if I wanted to lead the opening song. "Emma Jean can do it," I said.

Wiener.

The program took a left turn when Douglass spotted several members of the Glide Ensemble in the congregation and called everybody up to sing. And Vernon, freshly returned from Europe, was pressed upon to lead the song. "I don't know this one," he muttered to Emma Jean, but he gamely took a lyric sheet and felt his way through it. And of course, it was lovely. Even though the makeshift choir struggled to find its place in the new key, even though there was no discernible end to the tune, we still made music together.

And when it was over I was showered in hugs and exclamations: "We're so glad to see you up there! Thank you so much for singing!" Even Gisele and Emma Jean thanked me profusely for joining them. I was a little taken aback, since I barely did anything. I was just another body up there, but I guess sometimes moral support is just as good as vocal support.

And I guess sometimes, when someone shoves a mic in your face, you just ought to take it. And wing it.

Maybe next time.