To Get a Girl A Drink
by Errin Marie
I tried to do Beckett's last year
(Heard tales of their wicked green beer)
Meself and me lasses
Would sit on our asses
And drink till the day disappeared
But by half past five there was no entry
'Twas a guard at the door standing sentry
'Twere too many packed in
And the terrible din
Was enough to send us round the bend(try)
The problem with St. Paddy's Day
Is there's too many folks in the way
You can't get a beer
'Less you scream in the ear
Of a barman who's walking away
It's too much to get their attention
Like last year; I thought I would mention
That 'Er(r)in's' with ID
Should all drink for free
It should be an Irish convention
But the barman could not hear a word!
I'm telling you, it was absurd
The place was a-teeming
With lads that were screaming
And pushing past me to be served
The sight of it! What a disgrace!
The eejits were running the place!
They'd not be so shady
To ignore a lady
Were not they all drunk off their face
With the end of the eve drawing near
I'd still only gotten one beer
Said 'Bollocks!' and left
And feeling bereft,
I vowed to do better next year
But next year has now come to pass
And I'm kicking meself for me sass
For how can I hope
To out-shout the blokes
When I'm nothing more than a lass?
There's got to be some way, methinks
For a gal to get herself some drinks
I mightn't have balls
But I've got the gall
To sex the thing up a few winks
So I've thought up a plan that is flawless!
To best all the lads acting lawless
For next year, you see
I plan to wear a tee
That proclaims me as "Errin Go Braugh-less"
by Errin Marie
I tried to do Beckett's last year
(Heard tales of their wicked green beer)
Meself and me lasses
Would sit on our asses
And drink till the day disappeared
But by half past five there was no entry
'Twas a guard at the door standing sentry
'Twere too many packed in
And the terrible din
Was enough to send us round the bend(try)
The problem with St. Paddy's Day
Is there's too many folks in the way
You can't get a beer
'Less you scream in the ear
Of a barman who's walking away
It's too much to get their attention
Like last year; I thought I would mention
That 'Er(r)in's' with ID
Should all drink for free
It should be an Irish convention
But the barman could not hear a word!
I'm telling you, it was absurd
The place was a-teeming
With lads that were screaming
And pushing past me to be served
The sight of it! What a disgrace!
The eejits were running the place!
They'd not be so shady
To ignore a lady
Were not they all drunk off their face
With the end of the eve drawing near
I'd still only gotten one beer
Said 'Bollocks!' and left
And feeling bereft,
I vowed to do better next year
But next year has now come to pass
And I'm kicking meself for me sass
For how can I hope
To out-shout the blokes
When I'm nothing more than a lass?
There's got to be some way, methinks
For a gal to get herself some drinks
I mightn't have balls
But I've got the gall
To sex the thing up a few winks
So I've thought up a plan that is flawless!
To best all the lads acting lawless
For next year, you see
I plan to wear a tee
That proclaims me as "Errin Go Braugh-less"
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1 comment:
To put it in the words that an Irish-woman would: That was brilliant, lovey!
Seriously ... what an amazing super-limerick! You've got to submit that somewhere for outside publication.
And you're TOTALLY going to do a limerick for Women Writers!
Hope you're out with your "Errin Go Braugh-less" t-shirt tonight!
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